63: Becoming Your Next Best Self Might Be More Simple Than You Think

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You’ve heard the idiom to dress for the job you want, but today I’m not talking about just your clothes. It’s your attitude, your habits, your mindset. Becoming the next best version of you doesn’t have to be super complicated, yeah it’s gonna be work, but it’s worthwhile work.

Don’t wait until New Year to decide what new habit you want to start, or old one to drop. Choose now, who you want to BE and then align your habits with her.

Reminder: If you order the new Everyday Joy Planner on Amazon by Dec 9, you have their guarantee to have it by January 1st when we start our encouragement and growth group on Facebook. This group is going to be running from Jan 1 to Mar 31 to keep you aligned with your goals and mental wellness while giving yourself so much grace for life to happen. Let’s grow together!

Becoming Your Next Best Self

Hey, beautiful. Thanks for joining me again here today. I am just loving that you keep showing up. I love this. Okay. I wanna chat with you today about dressing for the job you want, but I’m not really talking about your clothes, like at all. Because to me, fashion and the clothes are so like flexible.

I’m definitely a let me wear leggings with absolutely everything kind of a gal, which I can wear leggings with an oversized sweatshirt and be like, okay, I’m chill. I’m at home. I can wear leggings with some athletic shoes and a nice windbreaker jacket and a high pony and I look like I’m ready for a jug.

Or I can wear leggings and a nice blazer with a graphic tee and you know, I’m ready for some business sort of function because I dress super casual for business stuff. Like, to me, leggings in a blazer are dressed up. So, uh, leggings all the way for me. So I’m talking about dressing for the job you want, but I’m not really talking about going to work or what you’re wearing. I’m talking about what you put on as in your attitude, your habits, your mindset, your beliefs, your thoughts, your actions. You know, I’m talking about how you carry yourself and how you think about yourself and the world around you dressing for the life you.

You know, not just your job, because I don’t like to say that motherhood is a job. Homemaking is a job for sure. It definitely is. That is work, and it is, it’s beautiful work, but it’s tough. But I think homemaking and motherhood together are, it’s difficult and it’s worthwhile. It is honorable, and it is noble, and it is beautiful, and it is hard work. Absolutely. When you are homemaking with kids around your, your ankles, doing anything with kids, grabbing onto your legs, screaming and crying and throwing tantrums is tough. It’s distracting, but the motherhood part isn’t the tough part. Right. It’s not the job. I mean, yeah.

There’s tough moments. Absolutely. Okay. But what I wanna say, reeling it in here to my point, is I don’t want you to wait until the new year to decide what new habit you wanna start or what old habit you wanna drop, right? I want you to choose right now because you get to choose right now who you want to be, and then align your habits with her, right?

So if you’re envisioning your next best, Go ahead and take a moment, like clear your mind, pause this and go do a brain dump if there’s so much going on, like in your brain right now. But I want you to take a minute to envision your next best self, not your, you know, highest, highest self, if it exists, or you know, if your whole life was perfect, if you did everything exactly correctly.

I don’t want you to picture, I want you to picture just your next best self, just you. Like for next year, who do you wanna be in 2023? That version of you. I want you to envision her who you wanna be by the end of 2023. Like give yourself one full year here. Like who do you wanna be at that point? What does she wear?

What does she eat? Does she eat breakfast? How does she act? How does she spend her free time? And I want you to write all of this down. Go ahead, get out. Fresh notebook, paper, whatever, like write down who you plan to be a year from now. What is the best version of you one year from now? How much could you accomplish between now and then in your inner work?

All right, so go ahead and write that down. What kind of things do you want to accomplish? Not just internal work-wise, but.  externally, even like what are your business goals, your home goals, your family goals, community goals, whatever. Like what do you want to have done between now and next year? You know, go ahead and write all of that down.

Keep this vision, like get it crystal clear. Exactly who you could be a year from now next? Yeah, we’re still writing. If you flip that paper over it would be great. Or if you have half of the paper still available, or get a clean sheet, that’s fine too. Whatever, whatever is for you, do that.

I want you to create a plan for how that future you is spending her day. What does her daily plan? What does her daily routine look like? When she wakes up in the morning, what does she do? What does she eat for breakfast? When does she eat breakfast? Does she eat breakfast? Does she skip it? Is she living off of coffee or is future you nourishing her body first thing in the morning? LIke I know most of us are failing to do, I am number one culprit on this. 

I’m not gonna pretend that I have everything together,but, what does she do? What does, what does your future you do? How does she spend her whole day? I mean, even down to what is she wearing? What does she look like? How does she wear her hair?

Who are you going to be a year from now? How are you gonna spend your exact day? What car are you gonna be driving? Is your car clean? What kind of condition is your car in? How about your home? How much time do you spend cleaning your home every day? How clean is your home? What about laundry? I want you to envision a typical day in the life of future you, December, 2023.

What is that version of you going to be doing in her days? That is. And I’m not saying if you stay on track right now with where you are, I’m saying like your ideal version of you one year from now, the best possible version of you one year from now. How is she spending her whole day? Okay. And now one by one.

I want you to start adjusting your habits and making better choices that align with her. You’re going to be her now. You don’t need the whole next. Whatever it is that’s going to get you from here to there is it’s inside you already. It’s just all the little changes and tweaks that you need to make, the different decisions you have to make.

Once you’re faced with that decision, making a better decision for you, and this is going to streamline, it’s going to speed up the process of you becoming her and it’s going to make it happen. Because here’s this thing, is that that future you already exists because you can see her in your mind. That future you is already a possibility because you can envision her, you can see her so clearly she exists in your mind right now, become her.

Be the best version of you that you possibly can be. And one by one, let go of the things that aren’t really you. Because chances are this future version of you that you’ve envisioned is you at your core. This is more aligned with who you genuinely, truly, authentically are.  and less of the masks you feel you have to wear less of people pleasing, less of hiding yourself and putting your light under a basket because of comparison or fear of rejection, fear of being seen, fear of success.

There’s so many fears that make us bottle up who we are and push it down deep, deep. And then we spent all our life trying to let that, like trying to find that version of you all over again instead of stripping away the pieces that aren’t even you. They’re just habits that you picked up, coping mechanisms that you picked up.

You just started living your life in a certain way because for a moment it made sense and now you’ve found yourself so misaligned with who you truly, deeply.

It happens so simply and give yourself all the grace in the world. If you are feeling so misaligned, because guess what? Awareness is number one. The number one thing is to become aware. That’s the first step. And then just start making these small steps. Start acknowledging, being mindful, noticing when you are making a choice out of.

and choose instead to make a choice out of love because the choice out of love will always be what is genuinely and authentically you. We are love at our core. I, I believe that so firmly that we are love at our core, but due to our life situations, traumas, society. Comparison fear. We push that love down and we become disconnected from it, and then we can’t figure out why we’re feeling anxious and depressed and miserable and feeling like we’re missing something and feeling stuck all the time.

It’s because we hid that love deep inside because we chose to act outta fear. Okay, so now you’ve created your.  and you have this, this daily rhythm routine schedule, right? And we’re gonna make decisions one by one to adjust slowly into becoming her, your future best self, your next best self, right? But don’t get crazy.

Hear me out on this. If this is the only thing you hear today, number one thing is to give yourself grace. Okay? Let this be a process. And it can be a slow process because guess what? Your timeline is made up. Okay. Time is arbitrary. It’s just how we, you know, we keep track of how much time has passed, but time doesn’t really mean anything.

Your time listed your, your timeline is irrelevant to, you know, God’s master plan, God’s will. Your timeline irrelevant. His timeline perfect. Okay. Let it be a process. Give yourself grace, make the choices one by one, and know that you will take one step forward, two steps back. Sometimes it’s gonna happen. It’s not an overnight, totally change your life, everything is perfect because you made this decision and now tomorrow you’re gonna wake up and you’re gonna live exactly step by step every moment of the day planned out as your next best perfect self. Right? That’s not going to happen if perfection is your goal. I’m sorry. I can’t help you.

Perfection is not real. It does not exist. Okay. The only perfection in the world is that you know, you’re perfect for your purpose. Everything works out the way it’s meant to in the end. But if you’re trying to plan for everything to be the human version of perfect, what we see is ideal and you know, I didn’t mess up anywhere, I never misstepped. Everything is symmetrical, everything is perfect. And you know that’s not gonna happen and I can’t help you make that happen cause it’s not real. Okay? I’m here for real and authentic and your truth, okay? That’s what I’m here for. So let it be slow. Give yourself grace. It’s not going to be perfect.

You’re not going to get everything right every single day. You’re gonna need days where you step back and you just revert completely to the older version of yourself into your coping mechanisms. You’re, you’re just gonna have to sometimes, but the big goal here is to keep moving forward. You get back up again and you keep moving forward.

You keep making the adjustments and don’t forget to look back and see how far you’ve. Every time you revert back, stop and say, Hey, look how far ahead I was that I was able to revert back to who I was. I’ve made the change before. I’ll make the change again, and I’ll go farther this time. Every time I’ll go farther and I’ll get better and it gets easier and easier.

Right to hold onto all these new habits because you’re letting go of the old ones. You’re building new ones. Everything in your life, everything you do is currently a habit. The things you think, the rhythm of your day, when you wake up, when you go to sleep, when you eat what you eat, these are habits you have and we change them one by one slowly building up these muscles that hold your habits together, you.

Okay, here is another exercise for you to try. Okay. Using water to influence your future. All right. Some people I’ve heard call this like timeline jumping, and I don’t totally know what I think about that because it sounds pretty crazy and far out there. But what I do know is that every moment you get to make a decision and every decision you.

It steps you forward towards your future, right? So any given moment, you are facing one to a thousand possible futures for you, right? And so every decision leads you down a different future path, right? So the way I see it, it’s not necessarily a timeline jumping into like another time warp kind of stuff that sounds really far out there to me.

But it is choosing your path, right? So this exercise uses water to influence your future. Okay? All right. So you get to make these shifts. You get to decide who you are every single day. That’s totally up to you 100%. You’ll get to choose what happens to you, but you get to choose how you’re gonna respond.

You get to choose who you’re going to be in that situation. All right? So try this when you’re in the shower next. And it’s a visualization exercise. All right, so as you’re letting the water wash over you, I want you to envision all of the traits and thoughts and habits that you currently have that are unwanted and unhelpful.

All right? And I want you to picture the water washing those things off of you. And I want you to picture them all in the water as it’s going down the drain. And I want you to just picture everything you don’t want to be anymore. Just getting washed off of you and down that drain. Okay? And I’ll hear this step.

You step out from under the water. So for a moment, the water’s not pouring on you and you just envision everything going all the way down the drain. You’re starting fresh, starting new. All right. Put distance between you and those unwanted traits, thoughts, habits. All right. Now, as you step back into the water, envision the traits and the thoughts and the habits that you do want and envision those pouring onto you.

Now, you’re putting on this new self. You’re putting on all the new traits and all the new thoughts, and all the new habits that you wanna have. You’re envisioning. What you want your life to look like from here on out and envision putting that on. You can even rub it on you with soap or lotion after your shower.

Envision putting on the habits and the traits that you want to have. Okay, so embody the you that you want to be. All right. This exercise can be super powerful. It’s really uplifting. I know the premise of it, the timeline jumping sounds insane and crazy, but as a mindset, , you gotta be able to get behind this that you are envisioning, taking off what you no longer want to be and putting on what you do want to be envisioned.

Putting on patience and kindness and love and, you know, envision taking off things like being late to everything. Envision putting on being organized. Envision taking off your quick to anger, envision taking off, yelling, and being short fused and envision putting on the patience and the love and the kindness and everything you do want to be okay my friend, my beautiful, beautiful friend.

Things that can help you become the you that you want to be are also being grateful for what you already have. We have talked about this before in past episodes, how gratitude will ground you. And help you be connected. And gratitude is your precursor to joy and peace. Gratitude is a catalyst for your life, okay?

Be practicing gratitude, be getting grounded in that. Be content with what you have right now. It’s going to amplify your life for the future, I promise. And affirmations. Noting what kind of thoughts you no longer wish to have, what thoughts don’t serve you? Get rid of those and replace them with an affirmation.

So anytime you’re hearing a thought like, I’m not enough, any kind of thought, telling you that you’re not good enough for something, you replace that immediately with an affirmation that says, I am enough. . And if you have to take that affirmation, you have to back it up with re reasons and past results, you know, that tell you that you are enough.

You know I’m enough because, you know, fill in the blank, whatever’s personal to you. Go ahead and do that. Gratitude and affirmations. And you know what? Setting intention, setting intention is going to be really big in this. You need to wake up every day. And intend on becoming that future you that you know you can be.

Okay. That’s setting your intention. We set our intention at the very beginning of this. Keep setting your intention every single day and keep moving forward toward that. All right? Now the best thing you can do is put these things in your daily planner. If you’re using a daily planner to stay organized or a notebook you write every single day, make space for those intentions, affirmation, and gratitude.

Because if you stay consistent with those things, it is a serious game changer, a life changer. It is a catalyst for so much growth and so much improvement to become exactly who you know you’re meant to be. Intention, affirmation, gratitude. All right. Now, these are three principles in my Everyday Joy Planner, the Meant To Bloom Planner for everyday joy.

The Daily Planner includes a space for intention, affirmation, and gratitude every single day, along with priorities and notes and time blocking and all of those things that are super duper helpful, and so I wanted to let you know this reminder that the Everyday Joy planner on Amazon. It’s currently in stock.

So if you ordered it right now, you could have it by next week. But typically it’s like a two, two to three week printing process before they ship it with their, you know, two day shipping, plus holidays coming up and stuff. So you wanna, you wanna get ahead on ordering this if you’re ordering them from Amazon.

I have the 2022 versions in stock. Currently, I’m running low, but I have those, they’ll end up the last of them and they are self dated. So 2022 just means it has a 2022 calendar at the front, but the whole rest is self dated. Start anytime. Okay. It’s the same thing with the newer versions, they are self dated.

Start them anytime. I just started my 2023 planner, which you. Doesn’t have any dates in it, it’s self dated. So I just started that for Jan for December instead of waiting till January. Becuase I just like to start as soon as I have it. I don’t care if it’s the beginning of a month or halfway through a month or whatever.

I start it when I have it because I wanna get in on it. So there’s no rules when it’s a self dated planner. You could start your months based on your menstrual cycles. It doesn’t matter. You start whenever it’s your, your planner, whatever helps you plan. Do that, you have the freedom to do that.

But anyways, I wanna let you know because of their two to three week printing and shipping on Amazon. Typically, if you’re gonna order one of the newer everyday joy planners, you wanna order it by December 9th to guarantee you’ll have it by January 1st. You can probably push it a little bit later, but I can’t make any promises and Amazon doesn’t make any promises if you push it later than that, just to give time for the weather and, you know, getting over snowy passes with it cuz these are printed. Well, I mean, I guess maybe it doesn’t have to come to snowy passes. Maybe you live close enough to the printing, that that wouldn’t matter. I can’t assume anything.

I’m gonna be starting a Facebook Group for encouragement and growth to keep on with your New Year’s goals and your mental wellness and to also give yourself so much grace for life to happen at the same time. I’m gonna be starting that group January 1st, and it will run till March 31st, so it’ll be a 90 day group of encouragement. I don’t like the word accountability.

I hate accountability groups. I do, but it’s encouragement and it’s growth and like we’re gonna be here for each other. It’s gonna be community, it’s gonna be motivational, but also like, You know, encouraging, really encouraging for personal growth and to give yourself grace and all that stuff.

So let’s grow together, get in on that group. I will have information on that group coming fairly soon. So this is just like, Hey, heads up. This group will be happening. But I do not currently have a link for you right now. But if you’re gonna wanna be in that group, there is no purchase necessary. You do not have to have the everyday Joy planner, but I will say you’re probably gonna want it, so you might as well go.

Grab it now so you’re not having, you know, FOMO over it. Later on when you’re in the group and everyone else is posting, you know, pics from inside their planners and you don’t have one. So just putting that out there. All right, friend, I love you so much. Remember that that cutoff date is like December 9th, so jump in on that if you want.

Guaranteed to have this planner, if you want the 2022 planner. I have limited stock. But the shipping would be almost immediate, like the first business day. I can ship it out to you cause I have those in my possession right now. So anyways, friend, love you so much. I will talk to you again next time.