56: Ditch the Holiday Stress & Have a Season of Peace & Joy Instead

Okay, Mama Scrooge. The holidays are happening. I don’t know if you go into the holidays with the Bah-Humbug spirit or if it just creeps in as you undergo the heavy stress of carrying every event, gift, plan, and meal on your shoulders, or if it happens in the moment your sanity snaps at Christmas Eve dinner with the in-laws, or if you manage to make it through all of the season in denial that you were actually miserable the whole time and nothing lived up to your expectations, but let’s unpack your beliefs and hopes about the holiday season. 

I need you to know that the holidays can be easy – in fact you should feel LESS stress now than any other time of the year – it’s kind of the whole point, you know, PEACE & JOY – that’s for you, too! 

Mama, you’re the one in charge of the energy, you’re the one who sets the tone. If you want a chill Christmas, it’s up to you to create it. If you want lavish parties or extravagant gifts, it’s up to you. If you want adventures, go seek them. 

You don’t have to do things the way you’ve always done them. You get to decide what your holiday season looks like and it doesn’t have to be more stressful than any other day of your life – in fact, it shouldn’t. Because this time of year is for mindfulness & gratitude that lead us into peace, love and joy! 

Make sure nothing is a HAVE to, it’s a WANT to. And if you don’t want to – don’t. 

I’ve put together an Unstressed Holiday Guide printable for you that’s got more than you need to have the holiday you really want. There’s party planning sheets, there’s a holiday bucket list template, a gift planner & tracker, there’s coloring pages so you can chill out or distract the kids, journal work and mindset shift, there’s permission to let it be easy, printable calendars to organize all the places you want to be and see where you’re leaving yourself blank space – because that’s a must! And self care tips and ideas too. The holidays are for you to experience peace, love and joy too. It’s not about you coordinating the perfect family gatherings – those don’t exist. Snag this in my Etsy shop and use code: PODCAST for an extra discount.

You Deserve an Unstressed Holiday

(transcribed with Descript)

Okay Mama Scrooge, let’s take a mental journey. The holidays are happening. I don’t know if you go into the holidays with the Bah-Humbug spirit or if it just creeps in as you undergo the heavy stress of carrying every event, gift, plan, and meal on your shoulders, or if it happens in the moment your sanity snaps at Christmas Eve dinner with the in-laws, or if you manage to make it through all of the season in denial that you were actually miserable the whole time and nothing lived up to your expectations, but let’s unpack your beliefs and hopes about the holiday season. 

I’m going to be referencing Christmas a lot in this episode – but I want you to go ahead and include Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, New Years, Festivus, Solstice and any other holiday you celebrate in there too. The point is to get you thinking and then get you moving on some action steps. 

First up, The Ghost of Christmas Long Past – what did your holidays look like as a child? What are your favorite holiday memories? What kind of traumas do you hang onto from the holidays? 

Let’s hear from The Ghost of Christmas Recent – What have holidays looked like since becoming a mom? Are you filing your plate with more than you can handle? Ending up with a lot of leftovers but still feeling unfulfilled? Does your holiday to-do list leave you feeling empty and crushed? 

Next up, The Ghost of Christmas Dreams – what does your perfect holiday season look like? Imagine the best Winter ever – it’s not about a single day. What are you doing, who are you surrounded by? What does your home look like? What activities do you take part in? 

I want you to really think and reflect on what’s important here in this season for you. I don’t want to say that it’s not about the gifts and consumerism and elaborate meals – I want to say it’s about Peace, Love and Joy – so what things actually bring that to you and your family? 

To me, it’s about love – and in the last couple of years, I’ve really learned to lean into the love languages and reflect on how each member of my family receives and feels love. For some it is gifts – they get more thought into their gifts. For other’s it’s quality time – they get invited to do more of the planning, and wrapping, and cooking with me. For some it’s physical touch – and I make sure they get intention snuggles and hugs throughout the season. There’s also words of affirmation and acts of service, build them up and help them out. The point is to look for opportunities to love one another instead of keeping score of how much money is spent on how many gifts for every single person. 

Take a moment to question: what would happen if you did Thanksgiving & Christmas completely differently this year? 

What if you ditched the gifts? 

What if the entire meal was store bought? 

What if you ordered Chinese take-out instead? 

What if you skipped the tree? 

What if you only decorated with branches and things you found in your backyard? 

What if you traded all your current party plans and threw one big potluck party for anyone who wanted to see your family this year? 

What if you took your family and ran away to a mountain retreat or a tropical getaway instead? 

What if you let people come over without doing your manic 3-day cleaning spree first? 

What if you let your home look lived in when your relatives come to visit?

What if you did anything differently than you’ve done it before? Does it feel good to let that go? Does it feel exciting but also wrong? 

I want you to question whether you do things because you enjoy it, or whether you do them because they’ve become an expectation or even an idol? 

Mama, you’re the one in charge of the energy, you’re the one who sets the tone. If you want a chill Christmas, it’s up to you to create it. If you want lavish parties or extravagant gifts, it’s up to you. If you want adventures, go seek them. 

You don’t have to do things the way you’ve always done them. You get to decide what your holiday season looks like and it doesn’t have to be more stressful than any other day of your life – in fact, it shouldn’t. Because this time of year is for mindfulness & gratitude that lead us into peace, love and joy! 

Make sure nothing is a HAVE to, it’s a WANT to. And if you don’t want to – don’t. 

I’ve put together an Unstressed Holiday Guide printable for you that’s got more than you need to have the holiday you really want. There’s party planning sheets, there’s a holiday bucket list template, a gift planner & tracker, there’s coloring pages so you can chill out or distract the kids, journal work and mindset shift, there’s permission to let it be easy, printable calendars to organize all the places you want to be and see where you’re leaving yourself blank space – because that’s a must! And self care tips and ideas too. The holidays are for you to experience peace, love and joy too. It’s not about you coordinating the perfect family gatherings – those don’t exist. Snag this in my etsy shop and use code: PODCAST for an extra discount.

Happiest Holiday Season to you friend!